Fallen out of love with your home? Here’s how to fix it

Fallen out of love with your home

Our relationships with our homes can be a bit of a rollercoaster. For many, it’s a love-hate affair, loving where you live but struggling with the house itself. Or seeing the potential but not knowing where to start. In many cases there are ways to overcome the challenges you’re facing with your home and reignite the spark that you once felt. Here are 5 reasons you might have fallen out of love with your home and what to do about it.

Fallen out of love with your home

The grass is always greener

Many of the people I meet who have fallen out of love with their home, consider moving rather than trying to fix the issues they are facing. In most cases, the best solution is to reinvest in your home rather than move.

When the house isn’t working its easy to lose sight of all the positives that will be hard to replicate elsewhere. Maybe the area and location where you live are great, maybe you have wonderful neighbours or perhaps its choice of great amenities in your neighbourhood that you love.

There are a lot of costs associated with moving house, financial being only one of them. If at all possible try to find a way to make the most of what you have.

The original job solved an immediate need but doesn’t work now.

Another reason that you may have fallen out of love with your home is that it hasn’t evolved with your circumstances and needs. It’s easy to rush into a home improvement project without a plan. Going for a quick fix solution is a short-sighted approach and probably the number one reason that people become frustrated with their homes over time.

Before you tackle any kind of home improvement try to take the long view. I’ve met people who at great expense went completely open-plan with their homes when their kids were young and then totally regretted it when they found themselves sharing their ‘nowhere to hide’ house with teenagers.

The best way to combat this kind of mistake is to seek some impartial advice before you do anything. Try to think about future requirements and not just what you need right now. You might even find that this kind of forward planning will stop you from doing certain things and it will definitely save you money.

If you have made mistakes in the past it’s best to put these behind you. Learn from them and be willing to undo some of the work.

Fallen out of love with your home

Too impatient to go for planning permission

I visited a home recently where the owners had done an extensive job on moving in. At the time they were anxious and impatient to move in so opted for a layout that didn’t require planning. Now 10 years on they are in need of more space and to gain it means undoing much of the original work.

Don’t be put off by planning. Yes you are opening yourself up to opinions from neighbours and there is a risk involved but compromising to avoid it is not wise.

Putting off the small stuff because you have a bigger project planned

If you are planning and have committed to a more significant project, this makes sense. If, however, your project is more of a some-day plan then then try to tackle small things as they crop up.

If fixtures and furnishings are broken, not working or started and not finished it’s going to have a negative impact on your day to day life. This might sound silly but even things like lights not working will have a negative effect on your expierence of your home. The best thing to do is to try tackle these things as they arise so it doesn’t seem like such a daunting task.

If things have gotten out of hand decide what needs to be done and prioritise your projects. Make a list and come up with a plan for getting through it. You’re never going to start it if you never write it down and prioritise it in the first place.

Fallen out of love with your home

Too much stuff

I read an article recently where experts were advising on creating places to hide stuff by way of offering storage and organisation advice. This is the worst possible advice.

Creating places to stash things is a recipe for disaster. It will either be a nightmare to find things or you won’t remember where you put them in the first place. You’ll end up going out and buying more of the same things and before you know it your home will be overloaded with stuff. Too much stuff can cause more stress than you realise and before you know it you’ll have fallen out of love with your home.

In a study carried out by UCLA where they surveyed 60 middle class families in Los Angeles, 3 out of 4 of the family’s garages could not fit cars because of excessive stockpiling of stuff. The survey also found that managing possessions had led to increased stress hormones in mothers.

Embrace the Marie Kondo way and get rid of anything you no longer need, want or like. Then look at ways to create designated storage, it should be as easy to put something away as it is to find it. A place for eve

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Denise O'Connor

Author Denise O'Connor

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